Family Connections: You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family, or can you?
From Christine Crosby, 3/2/2010 12:44:25 PM
You can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family! We’ve all heard that expression before, or some variation.
I’m a baby boomer and I grew up in a highly dysfunctional family. How about you? How did I know my family was dysfunctional? I watched those wonderful family shows like Father Knows Best, Leave it to Beaver, The Donna Reed Show, etc. Subsequently, I grew up ashamed of my own family who didn’t come close to being like the families I watched on these television shows. I was constantly disappointed that my mom didn’t look and act like Donna Reed, and that my family wasn’t one to exemplify the classic American “2.5 kids and a dog” standard.
Speaking of dogs, many of us consider our pets an important part of our family. I do, and from the billions of dollars spent on pets these days, from pet food, pet hotels, pet clothes, pet toys, pet medical care through pet memorial services, I think some pets are treated better than some of the human family members. What does that tell us?
Family life is complex and getting more so. It’s hard not to compare yourself and your family to fictional characters in books, movies, songs and TV. Plus, we endure another boat load of messages from well meaning friends. It’s increasingly difficult to know what REAL families are all about and how to make the best from these crucial relationships; but don’t give up. With a touch of humor and a lot of forgiveness, all is possible.
As funny guy, Jeff Foxworthy said, “If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty. “